Friday, August 22, 2008
Today a lanky hipster girl sauntered into my place of employment/bloggery. I was amused by her apparel – a kelly green button-up belted dress ironically paired with mucho-over-sized-hot-pink-framed sunglasses (which she, of course, did not remove despite her indoor location). But I became even more amused when she inserted her large sketch pad with some kind of design sketches (hopefully that won’t end up on the scrawny bods of future hipster generations) into the scanner, made a bunch of color copies (they are tots $1 each!), looked sketchily at me looking sketchily at her and inched her way to the door. I glared at her at her as she opened it, which I’m sure made her eyes widen to the size of saucers under those actual-saucer-sized eye protectants, and I thought she knew she was busted and would decide to pay for her scans. She skeptically walked back over toward the counter, but instead of completing her transaction, she just closed the lid that was left ajar and darted out of the room!
I mean, who does she think she is Misha Calvert? This is not a bodega and those were not bottles of Colt 45. I thought about calling her out, but whatever. I had just painted my nails and didn’t want to risk smudging should I have to grab her by her bony arm.
I am discontent with the hipster theft, but I also think that I am being credited for it in some kind of karmic redemption process: So far I have accumulated FIVE PAIRS OF OVERSIZED SUNGLASSES left behind by customers that I can wear to look inconspicuous when I am hipster scouting. The hipster world works in mysterious ways!